Rashida Abedi obituary

My friend, Rashida Abedi, who has died of cancer aged 65, handled her profound deafness with courage and her story, recorded in her autobiography From Sound to Silence (1988), inspired many others.

Rashida was born and grew up in Quetta, Pakistan, to where her father had retired after working for the Indian railways. She lost the hearing in her right ear after a severe attack of meningitis when she was 14. “I was advised by specialists to leave school,” she recalled. “All my hopes were destroyed. From then on my life was confined to the house. Most of the time was spent helping my mother, and I also used to knit, do embroidery and read books. We had a radio and my favourite hobby was listening to radio plays in Urdu.”

A marriage was arranged for Rashida, but after she lost the hearing in her left ear at 21, the engagement was broken off. “It was a cruel blow. I prayed to God I should die.” She recalled “agonising sadness and loneliness”. In 1981 Rashida’s brother, Syed, who had been long settled in London, brought her to the UK in the hope of finding a cure.

After it was confirmed that nothing could be done, she concentrated on making the most of new opportunities. I first got to know her in 1982 when she joined the English class I taught at South Norwood Adult Education Centre and made amazing progress despite never having heard the language. I thought it was a miracle. Soon she had progressed to an advanced class, was learning lip-reading and computing, and found things to interest her in the lives of friends from many different backgrounds.

Then, in 1983, a letter from the Home Office threatened deportation. A campaign to fight against it gathered strong support, including from the local MP, Bernard Weatherill, and went nationwide through the British Deaf Association. Rashida spoke movingly and fluently in both English and Urdu to a large public meeting in Croydon. She won her case and was once again “able to concentrate on the bright side of my life”. She said she had many things to look forward to and wrote her autobiography in the hope that others would find inspiration from her story to overcome similar problems and lead a full life.

After Syed’s death, Rashida shared a home with her sister Fatima and brother-in-law Kazim, and was very attached to the younger members of the family – she particularly loved children. She was a loving, optimistic person with a great sense of humour. She loved meeting new people and we travelled together to English language classes across Britain to publicise her book. She wrote: “This country has given me so much, I am glad to return something by giving others the confidence that they too can learn to speak good English and maybe even write a book themselves.”

She is survived by her sisters, Fatima and Yasmin, and brother, Akbar.

Rashida Abedi obituary