Declaring my cancer on First Dates has helped others | Annie Slater

I always confuse people who meet me. This is because even when I’m feeling awful, I look perfectly healthy. So as I sat across from my date I had to tell him the truth – even with the cameras rolling.

“I am actually dying. Slowly but surely. I’m fine about it. All it does is keep things in perspective.” Barry and I were on our first date but I had to be me, and that’s totally upfront.

I had first applied for Channel 4’s First Dates in summer 2015. At the time I was focused on getting on with my life, after being treated for breast cancer. Before starting treatment I’d had my eggs frozen, as I really wanted to have children one day. But three years later and aged 36, I still hadn’t met someone. I didn’t want to try online dating and I’m terrible at flirting. So I needed help.

I’d put the cancer behind me, which is why I didn’t mention it on the application form. But by the time First Dates called, in March 2016, scans had revealed that the cancer had returned in my bones. This time it was incurable.

I went through so many emotions, but my family and friends were brilliant. They just got on with it and gave me the ability to do the same.

When I got the call from the reality dating show, I didn’t want to lie about my situation. They were nothing but supportive, so in May 2016 I made it to the restaurant in London for my date.

The diagnosis isn’t who I am – it’s just something I have to live with

Telling Barry was much harder than I ever thought. Not because of all the cameras but because I hate getting attention from the diagnosis. But it wasn’t fair for him to find out I was terminally ill when the episode eventually aired. Plus, the diagnosis isn’t who I am – it’s just something I have to live with.

I waited until halfway through the meal to tell him. Barry was lovely and totally made me at ease, and he even wanted to see me again. Although I had a terrific date though, and Barry was a fantastic guy, I just didn’t fancy him.

While First Dates didn’t lead to love, it opened up an incredible opportunity to help other people like me.

After the episode aired, a producer put me in touch with Marie Curie. When the charity asked me to be involved in a project to help raise awareness about their work – providing care to people living with terminal illnesses – I knew this was something I wanted to do. I’m now volunteering as an expert voice for Marie Curie, sharing my experience and providing advice to help the charity.

I don’t focus on how much time I have left. The thing I do worry about is being in pain at the end. Like many people with a terminal illness, I don’t want to die in hospital. I’m not sure if I want go into a hospice or be cared for at home, but I think everyone should have the choice. That’s why I’m supporting Marie Curie – so more people can receive the support they need to spend their final days where they want to.

Earlier this month, I attended the launch of the charity’s Garden of Light to celebrate the start of the Great Daffodil Appeal. Seeing the installation of 2,100 daffodils – one for each of the Marie Curie nurses across the UK – at Paternoster Square in London was really special.

The hardest thing about my diagnosis is accepting that I’m never going be a mum. I feel lucky for the life I have had but also sad that it is going to end. I don’t feel ready for that.

I’m determined to make the most of every opportunity that comes my way. From travelling to Paris and drinking loads of wine to riding on the Greenpeace boat and hearing the choir sing at St Paul’s – and maybe even finding love –I still have so much I want to do.

• Annie Slater volunteers for Marie Curie, whose Great Daffodil Appeal runs until 31 March. Funds raised will help Marie Curie nurses care for people living with a terminal illness in their own homes and the charity’s hospices. Visit www.mariecurie.org.uk/daffodil or call 0800 304 7025 to find out more.
  

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Declaring my cancer on First Dates has helped others | Annie Slater

The Battle Towards Cancer…AIDS…Depression – End Declaring War on Your self.

The battle against cancer…
The battle towards aids…
The fight against depression…

When did we all decide that “fighting against” some thing was the best most successful course of action? Declaring an inner war within your self does not say, “healing” to me.

Several of the remedies that western medicine subscribe to are doing just that – chemotherapy and radiation, antidepressants, immunosuppressants, and even diet drugs all operate towards the body’s regular responses.

On an external level feel about how you come to feel when you fight with someone. Stressed, tense, angry, tight, pressured, agitated, unsettled – none of these are optimistic.
Now, forget the other individual for a moment and put a duplicate of by yourself there in front of you to yell at and combatively engage with. Does that seem productive or healthy? Does it truly feel good?

On a cellular level that’s exactly what you are choosing as your attempted path in the direction of wellness – scolding and anger, telling your entire body it is wrong for behaving as it is and fighting against it…

When your entire body is in a state of condition (dis-ease) it is striving to communicate with you. It is sending you signals that one thing is incorrect. Rather than immediately attempting to cover the signs and symptoms (signals), which is akin to saying “shut up” in an argument, a fully distinct technique would be to try and interoperate the message and in carrying out so heal and release the real lead to.

An amazingly valuable guide was written by Louise L. Hay referred to as Heal Your Body. It offers with the root level metaphysical causations (your psychological, emotional, and spiritual thoughts and or beliefs that might be lending to the cause of this physical manifestation of sickness). This is an A-Z listing of ailments that you can use as a reference guide to assist you find out to hear your body. The more you do this, the simpler it gets to plug into your own intuition – we have all the answers within of us, we just need to have to understand to listen.

How to use the guide:
1. Look up the result in. See if you really feel this is correct for you. If not, sit quietly and inquire by yourself, “what could be the thoughts in me that designed this?”
2. Repeat to your self (out loud if you can), “I am willing to release the pattern in my consciousness that has designed this condition.”
3. Repeat the new believed pattern to your self many instances.
four. Presume you are currently in the procedure of healing.
-Whenever you feel about your condition, repeat these measures.

Examples:

Cancer – Stems from: Deep hurt and long standing resentment. Deep secret grief a literal consuming away at the self. Carrying hatreds. A feeling of “what’s the use?”

The mantra/thought pattern to help right this: I lovingly forgive and release all of the previous. I choose to fill my globe with joy. I love and approve of myself.”

AIDS – Stems from: Denial of the self. Sexual guilt. A robust belief in not being “good enough”.

The mantra/imagined pattern to assist proper this: I am a Devine magnificent expression of daily life. I rejoice in my sexuality. I rejoice in all that I am. I adore myself.”

High Blood Stress – Stems from prolonged standing unresolved emotional difficulties. A volcano. Creating mountains out of molehills.

The mantra/believed pattern to aid appropriate this: I joyously release the previous. I am at peace.

Click here to see the complete online PDF listing: http://www.docstoc.com/docs/8755001/Bodytalk—Louise-L-Hay—Heal-Your-Entire body

It has been scientifically confirmed that a very good attitude and belief that you will get effectively aids tremendously in recovery from ailment and surgeries. It is not so far of a stretch to feel that you can hold two-way communications with your cells. We influence our bodies on a cellular degree by the thoughts we feel, the words we say and the emotions that we hold.

So 1st step to true wellness? – Change your thoughts – Drop the weapons and cease declaring war on yourself. Consider alternatively functioning with your entire body. Inform your entire body that you really like it, thank it for the message and that you now allow oneself to heal.

Second stage: Locate modalities of healing that encourage this method. No one particular single approach performs for every person. We are all different the leads to of our illnesses are individual.

Some valuable healing ideas:

Nutritional blood evaluation
Dietary response testing
Cellular degree cleansing –BePure 21 Day Cleanse
Making use of important oils and Bach flower remedies medicinally
Creating positive you drink great clean pure water
Juicing
Organic non-GMO foods
Massage
Rolfing for structural realignment
Acupuncture/Acupressure
Get lots of sunshine
Get physical exercise
meditate
Do things that make you content
Get rid of as a lot stress as possible
Pink Himalayan salt baths as properly as internally 1 teaspoon everyday.
Dry brushing to help clear and circulate lymphatic drainage
Restrict chemical product use and go as natural as you can
Thermography imaging rather than radiating the physique to diagnose cancers
Use a holistic mercury totally free dentist

The kinder you can be to by yourself, the more most likely you are to heal completely.

The Battle Towards Cancer…AIDS…Depression – End Declaring War on Your self.